Gay Paris

[magictreehouse]

Hooray! I’m back! Miss me? Of course you did because you know that now I’m back you’ll get an dissertation on how my holiday went :D

 

Saturday 25^th August

We woke up at stupid o’clock and took a train to Manchester airport. Turns out that airports are the dullest places ever really. But at least they had music TV going on so I got to watch Robyn for a bit. What we also didn’t like about the place was that it’s assumed that you know what you’re doing when we didn’t actually have a clue. But the staff were very helpful and we managed to do the whole thing fairly easily. We needn’t have got there so early either because the plane wasn’t full at all.

 

So flight then. Well, it being my first time I wasn’t that happy about James being sat next to the aisle from me although it was probably a good thing that I wasn’t sat next to a window. I had no idea what to expect really so I was fairly terrified, and it was probably for the best that the flight only lasted an hour. Flying is noisy isn’t it? But overall it wasn’t too bad. On the way back we were next to a window so it was cool to look out over the clouds. I still haven’t quite got my head around the whole business but once I got used to it it was ok. What wasn’t ok (and what was a constant annoyance over the whole holiday) was fucking screaming kids. It was unbearable on the flight back and it makes me glad that neither me nor James want a family. I’d just want them to shut the fuck up all the time.

 

Anyway, negatives aside we got to Paris hitch free and bought an RER 5 day ticket. I was a shame to my country and chickened out of trying to speak French. James did most of it and we muddled through really. I didn’t know that they had double decker tube trains in Paris so that was a nice surprise. Also we bumped into fantastic French cliché number 1 – a guy playing an accordion on the Metro. Brilliant! We were staying in Torcy which was east, on the outskirts of Paris. It wasn’t too much hassle getting in and out of Paris though because it was on the main line, and three stops from Disneyland. So, on arrival in Torcy we (eventually) found the hotel and found our room, which was lovely really. It was small but new and was well worth the cheap price we paid.

 

We were extremely lucky with the weather although, y’know, France actually gets a summer and boy had I forgotten what summer felt like. Weirdly I got more of a tan in Paris in five days then I’ve got from being in England for a whole year! But we had perfect weather every single day. And France looks glorious in the summer. All the buildings seem to be lighter and the sun reflecting off them looks lovely. I can see why you’d fall in the love with the place because when me and James were out and about we’d spot something that looked really nice and by the end of the holiday we just resigned ourselves to the fact that everything looked beautiful. I never realised what a dirty, smelly city London was in comparison.

 

Anyway, in the evening we headed to the Disney Village and had a look around. Disneyland is just great though. There’s just a sense of fun about the place that I love. In the Disney Village there’s a great big hot air balloon that goes up 100m so we had a ride on that. The view was great from up there and it was great to see all of the parks and beyond. Paris and views seemed to be a theme of the holiday. For tea we went to Planet Hollywood which, well, it wasn’t a let down as such, it was just a bit uninspiring in comparison to the rest of the food we ate but I do like the place.

 

Sunday 26^th August

For breakfast we headed out to Val D’Europe and had a wander around the lovely shops and ate in a little bakery. I had a pain au chocolat (mmm, can’t beat them) and Earl Grey! Hehe. Although it was damn fine tea I can tell you. Then we headed down to the Sea Life Centre. Hoorah! I never get tired of looking at the fishes and it was one of the best aquariums I’ve ever been to. They had all the water creatures I could ask for. Lobsters, every variety of conger eel ever, octopus (although I’m still yet to see one move about properly), turtles and even a ray that came to the surface and waved at James! So yes, good times. Another good thing about the holiday is that the merchandise is relatively cheap so I bought a cuddly crab called Monsieur Crabbe from there. Hehe, yes, we had much fun changing all our silly in-jokes into French. Mange, mange, mange.

 

For dinner we went to Cafe Mickey in the Disney Village (see a theme yet?). Who would have thought that Disneyland had such nice food?! I had Tinkerbell’s Goat’s Cheese tart for starter and it was delicious. Then there was Mulan’s Noodles, Captain Hook’s Crème Brulee (hell yes) and Alice’s ‘Drink Me’ cocktail. I’m hungry just thinking about it. We got to sit outside in the sun and be entertained by Disney characters. I shook hands with Goofy which pleased me :D

 

After dinner we headed into Paris itself and had a look around Monmartre. I’ve always wanted to go there purely on the basis of Amelie being set there. It is my favourite film after all. For this reason I made us get off at Gare de Nord as there’s several scenes set there and we had to walk up some mother of a hill to get to the Sacre Coeur. But hey, it was well worth it. We had a little rest in the garden at the top and then took in the magnificent view. I’ve never seen anything like it. And inside the cathedral itself is wondrous. So beautiful, as is Monmartre itself which had a walk round. It didn’t disappoint at all. We even bumped into fantastic French cliché number 2 – a mime who made me give him money before he’d let me have his photo taken with him!

 

We took in the general feel of the place and saw many artists. We had a sit down in Place Du Abbesses and watched a crazy cat try to climb a rather tall tree. Ambitious animals in France! On the way down I was so glad to bump into ‘The Two Windmills’ café featured in Amelie. I had no idea where it was so I we were lucky to see it. It’s a lovely little place too. Shame we didn’t get chance to have a drink in there though. Still, we did see the actual two windmills that stand on the top of Monmartre and, of course, The Moulin Rouge.

 

Then we headed off from Blanche to Torcy and took tea home from The Chicken Spot and watched rubbish French TV! We caught their equivalent of ‘Treasure Hunt’ at one point and a programme about some bimbo who was going to America. Some crap is universal. In fact, their magazines are very similar. They even appeared to have a Jordan and Peter type couple called Tatyana and Xavier. Wonderful.

 

Monday 27^th August

Monday was when we did the Walt Disney Studio park. It’s smaller than the main one and managed to do most of it. In both parks we stuck to a no-longer-than-30-minute-wait for rides which served us well. Crush’s Coaster might have been the best ride ever created but it still wouldn’t have been worth the two hour waiting time! Still we did, Armageddon, Aerosmith’s Rock N Rollercoaster, the Studio Tram Tour, the Art of Disney Animation, Animagique, and the Motoeur Actions stunt show. The joy of the parks is that if you don’t like big rides then there is plenty to do. However, it turns out that I do love big rides, having not been to a theme park in years. The shows were ace too. Animagique was well worth it as was the excellent stunt show. There was the parade too of course which was great.

 

Having done one park in good time, thanks to our two day hopper tickets we could go and do some of the main Disneyland Park. So we went to Discovery Land and went on Star Tours, Space Mountain: Mission 2, Honey I Shrunk the Audience and Nautilus. The joy of going on rollercoasters with James, especially ones with photos is that he pulls the funniest faces on them. We bought an Aerosmith rollercoaster one, but the funniest thing was the most unlikely looking woman going on Space Mountain James called the ‘Boglin Lady’ because that’s what she looked like. Her photo was brilliant and we were tempted to buy it even though we weren’t on it!

 

Having done our fair share of that Park we went back to the Disney Village and went to Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show for tea which was brilliant! Slightly odd having your tea and watching a show at the same time and I usually hate the audience participation things but everyone was so into it and having a good time that it was impossible not to enjoy it. I was impressed that there was bison and buffalo grazing about too. Much fun. Packing the hats they give you was a pain though!

 

Tuesday 28^th August

 

Back to Disneyland to finish off the park and we did Phantom Manor, Big Thunder Mountain, Cabane Des Robinsons, Adventure Isle, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Peril, Pirates of the Caribbean, It’s A Small World, The Legend of the Lion King (good but not as good as the Lion King Musical obviously), Disneyland Railroad, Sleeping Beauty’s Castle, Mad Hatter’s Tea Cups, Alice’s Curious Labyrinth, watched the Candlebration, Le Pays des Contes de Fees and finally, Aladdin’s Enchanted Passage, because I’m never one to pass up the opportunity to explore an enchanted passage.

 

That took us up to tea time! And we went on the Pirates of the Caribbean again as a prelude to tea because we ate in the Blue Lagoon which was absolutely amazing! And in the perfect setting, surrounded by lanterns in the dark and seeing the boats of the ride go by. I don’t think I’ve ever had a meal as good. I had crab for starter, ostrich for main a, err, pineapple thing with chocolate cake for dessert, James didn’t know what he had for dessert either but that was lovely too. It was just wonderful. Oh, and we snuck a quite ride on Snow White’s Ride on the way out as the queue had gone down from over an hour to about five minutes.

 

Wednesday 29^th August

 

I had a lovely start to the day because James had sneaked out and bought me pastries while I was asleep so we had those for breakfast. Good boyfriend :D After that we took the RER into Paris to the Arc de Triomph which still impresses me every time I see it. Almost as amazing is the traffic around there. How does it know where it’s going?! Although the traffic never seems to stop in Paris unlike here, I fear for my life when crossing their roads! After that we went down the Champs-Elysses, then along the Seine to the Eiffel Tower. It took us forever to get up the damn thing. We must have queued longer for that than anything in Disneyland! In the queue we were being accosted by some beggars who clearly pray on English tourist so when one asked James if he spoke English he just said ‘non’ which amused this French couple in the front of us because we’d been wittering on in English for ages before that.

 

The Eiffel Tower was amazing though. I actually thought that you got the best view from the second floor rather than the top one, although wherever I was I’ve never seen a view like it. Wonderful stuff. I had the highest dinner I’ve ever had up there, along with the highest wee. Boy, I’m glad I recorded that here.

 

After that we had a wander down the Seine again, past the Musee d’Orsay and had a sit down outside the Louvre, which is a great building. We didn’t have time to do the museums this time so we’ve vowed to go back and do them some other time. After that we went and saw Notre Dame. Inside is utterly amazing, just because it’s so huge. Finally we went past Centre Georges Pompidou. Naturally we ended up at the Disney Village for tea and ate in the Rainforest Café. Monkeys!

 

Thursday 30^th August

 

We had a bit of time to kill before we had to go to the airport so we sat in the Jardin des Plantes which is a lovely little botanical garden. There a zoo next to it too so we have to go back now! Oh, and I saw fantastic French cliché number 3 – a man carrying huge sticks of French bread! After that we flew home and collapsed on the sofa at around half 8. It was nice to get back really. Travelling is always the worst part of a holiday

 

I think. I shall write about the weekend tomorrow I think.